Below the links is my post. The links are my trial and posts about Saffron Extract Satiereal:
June 24th 2012http://cody-the-clydsdale.blogspot.com/2012/06/running-on-broken-toe-saffron-extract.html
June 7th 2012 http://cody-the-clydsdale.blogspot.com/2012/06/saffron-extract-satiereal-appetite.html
June 6th http://cody-the-clydsdale.blogspot.com/2012/06/weight-triathlon-diet-and-change-of.html
Last month I'd said that I'd start writing on my blog about my struggles with food. At first when I decided to write openly about my weight and food issues I felt great. I felt like I was getting years of junk off my shoulders , and the possibility of helping others who struggle with their weight like I do was even better. But I've decided I'm not going to post on my blog that I struggle with an eating disorder very often anymore. My skin just isn't thick enough. Many of the comments I received were well meaning, but they hurt my feelings.
One well meaning fellow told me when I succumb to my over eating I am sinning against God, that I was an adulterer, and an idolater. He said if I continued to fall off the wagon and overeat then my sin was the same as a homosexual who succumbed to his desires, and that if I continued to overeat I should question if I had truly accepted Christ into my heart. Ultimately I agree with what he said about sin, but the delivery was totally unacceptable. As a more mature christian he should have attempted to lead by the biblical model, like Jesus did, by teaching with love in his heart. I believe a much better approach would have been to say my overeating is a sin, Jesus loves sinners, and that there's healing through Jesus. At that point he could have gently and kinly explained how that was possible through Jesus Christ. But I feel instead he was trying to make me feel bad enough about myself and my sin that I may be led to turn to Christ out of guilt or fear. But for me the opposite is true. I love Jesus so much that my love for Him motivates me to repent of my sins.
This well meaning fellow also advised me that there is no such thing as addictions, the struggles I'm faced with are caused by my heart being filled with sin. So in that case I'll attempt not to use the phrase addiction anymore, I'll call it what it always has been, an eating disorder.
From now on I'll be more than happy to help anyone who struggles with their weight, or their relationship with food. Simply email me and I'll jump to offer all the assistance I can muster, but I wont be writing about my eating disorder very often on my blog anymore, it's not worth the heart ache.
Thanks to me gaining 20 pounds earlier this year I'm not gaining speed from my training as quickly as I had the last time I was training for sprint distance triathlons. And thanks to me dieting to drop the the extra weight I'd packed on I'm not recovering as quickly as I normally do. My legs are constantly tight, sore, and I feel fatigued. I'd still be healing quickly enough to be responding well from my training if I was dieting moderately, but I'm attempting to drop 3 pounds a week. That means cutting out 1,500 calories a day from my diet. I've been miserable with hunger every second of the day since dropping to this low of calories, so I ordered some Saffron Extract Satiereal. I heard about Saffron Extract Satiereal on the Dr Ozz show, it's a hunger suppressant that has no stimulants in it. I know that it's stupid to use hunger suppressants, especially while training as hard as I am now. I've never used any pills like this before, I just want to get back down to my dream weight of 179. After being attacked from my posts on my eating disorder, and because of the suddenness and severity of the crappy feelings that was a result of them, I just want a quick victory to lift my spirits. My desires to feel happier and me justifying my actions doesn't mean it's ok, I know it's a bad decision, but it's my consequences to suffer. I'm currently weighing in at 189, I have 10 pounds to lose. With the use of the Saffron Extract Satiereal pills 10 pounds of weight loss should take me 24 days. I've always been honest here on my blog. I'd prefer this not to become a debate and I'd prefer to not end up reading some more well meaning but ultimately hurtful comments. If you have any feeling on this matter, kindly keep them to yourselves, I don't think I can handle anymore "loving guidance" for awhile.
Showing posts with label Jesus. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jesus. Show all posts
March 25, 2012
The bible has exactly what I need right now.... always
I'm always amazed by the bible. Every time I read it I find something in it that I had missed before, that is comforting to me when I needed comforting, or I find something that I should be doing better with in my life. Last year I had read the parable of the talents, Matthew's 25 14-30. I was so moved by this parable I wrote about that parable in my blog. You could read it by clicking this link: The parable of the talents.
Last year this parable moved me because I realized God gave each of us a talent and it was our responsibility to figure out what our talents are and figure out a way to glorify and serve God with those talents. I had realized in this parable that the master (Jesus) rewarded each of the first 2 servants equally even though the 1st servant was able to do twice as much for God as the 2nd servant. What matters isn't how much talent you are given, what counts is what you do with the talent God gave us.
Last year when I read the parable of the talents I realized God gave me a love for triathlon. So I started trying to glorify God as much as I could through my racing, training, and also through this blog.But recently when I read the parable of the talents I realized something entirely different than I did last year. I realized I was far to similar to the third servant who said, 'Master,' he said, 'I knew that you are a hard man, harvesting where you have not sown and gathering where you have not scattered seed. So I was afraid and went out and hid your talent in the ground. See, here is what belongs to you.'His master replied, 'You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed? Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest.'
I've realized I am all too similar to the third servant because I haven't been sharing 'the good news' with my co-workers, with inmates, with my friends, and with my family. I was trying to live as God wanted me to live, by being an example to others, but I wasn't trying to bring others to Christ. The bible teaches that sharing 'the good news' is the most important job a christian will EVER do, and I didn't feel confident in myself or my knowledge to do such important work. I've realized God wants me to go out and try even if I don't feel like I'm capable of fulfilling Gods request. I realized recently that in Exodus 4 Moses told God ...."I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.” I realized that even Moses felt overwhelmed, yet with Gods power Moses did amazing things! And eventually I realized I need to trust in God. If He wants me to spread Gods word I should. My responsibility is to try and plant the seed, it's Gods to make it grow. I had never understood what Mark 4:26-29 meant until I decided to spread Gods word and try to bring others to Christ. Mark 4:26-29 reads "....A man scatters seed on the ground. 27 Night and day, whether he sleeps or gets up, the seed sprouts and grows, though he does not know how. 28 All by itself the soil produces grain—first the stalk, then the head, then the full kernel in the head. 29 As soon as the grain is ripe, he puts the sickle to it, because the harvest has come.” Now I know it means I need to try to bring others to Christ and share the good word. If the seeds (the good news) I'm spreading take root or not isn't my concern, it's Gods business. How it works when the seed germinates (if the people I shared the good news with turn to Christ) isn't my business, it's Gods. My only concern is to try and share Gods word with everyone I can every opportunity I can. It's not by mistake that I work in a maximum security prison, there are a lot of people, both staff and inmates alike who need to turn to Christ. God placed me there to be an example and to try to bring others to Christ, I'm going to do my best to accomplish that.
Another verse I've found that comforts me when I feel like I'm not capable of doing as well as God deserves is 1 Corinthians 3:6-9 I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. He who plants and he who waters are one, and each will receive his wages according to his labor. For we are God's fellow workers. You are God's field, God's building.
In the last 10 days I've shared the good news with 3 staff and 6 inmates. Each time I do it I get a little better at it and feel a little more confident. I'm so grateful to be trusted with such an amazing job by God. I'm humbled and excited to continue doing it as frequently as I can.
Last year this parable moved me because I realized God gave each of us a talent and it was our responsibility to figure out what our talents are and figure out a way to glorify and serve God with those talents. I had realized in this parable that the master (Jesus) rewarded each of the first 2 servants equally even though the 1st servant was able to do twice as much for God as the 2nd servant. What matters isn't how much talent you are given, what counts is what you do with the talent God gave us.
Last year when I read the parable of the talents I realized God gave me a love for triathlon. So I started trying to glorify God as much as I could through my racing, training, and also through this blog.But recently when I read the parable of the talents I realized something entirely different than I did last year. I realized I was far to similar to the third servant who said, 'Master,' he said, 'I knew that you are a hard man, harvesting where you have not sown and gathering where you have not scattered seed. So I was afraid and went out and hid your talent in the ground. See, here is what belongs to you.'His master replied, 'You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed? Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest.'
I've realized I am all too similar to the third servant because I haven't been sharing 'the good news' with my co-workers, with inmates, with my friends, and with my family. I was trying to live as God wanted me to live, by being an example to others, but I wasn't trying to bring others to Christ. The bible teaches that sharing 'the good news' is the most important job a christian will EVER do, and I didn't feel confident in myself or my knowledge to do such important work. I've realized God wants me to go out and try even if I don't feel like I'm capable of fulfilling Gods request. I realized recently that in Exodus 4 Moses told God ...."I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.” I realized that even Moses felt overwhelmed, yet with Gods power Moses did amazing things! And eventually I realized I need to trust in God. If He wants me to spread Gods word I should. My responsibility is to try and plant the seed, it's Gods to make it grow. I had never understood what Mark 4:26-29 meant until I decided to spread Gods word and try to bring others to Christ. Mark 4:26-29 reads "....A man scatters seed on the ground. 27 Night and day, whether he sleeps or gets up, the seed sprouts and grows, though he does not know how. 28 All by itself the soil produces grain—first the stalk, then the head, then the full kernel in the head. 29 As soon as the grain is ripe, he puts the sickle to it, because the harvest has come.” Now I know it means I need to try to bring others to Christ and share the good word. If the seeds (the good news) I'm spreading take root or not isn't my concern, it's Gods business. How it works when the seed germinates (if the people I shared the good news with turn to Christ) isn't my business, it's Gods. My only concern is to try and share Gods word with everyone I can every opportunity I can. It's not by mistake that I work in a maximum security prison, there are a lot of people, both staff and inmates alike who need to turn to Christ. God placed me there to be an example and to try to bring others to Christ, I'm going to do my best to accomplish that.
Another verse I've found that comforts me when I feel like I'm not capable of doing as well as God deserves is 1 Corinthians 3:6-9 I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. He who plants and he who waters are one, and each will receive his wages according to his labor. For we are God's fellow workers. You are God's field, God's building.
In the last 10 days I've shared the good news with 3 staff and 6 inmates. Each time I do it I get a little better at it and feel a little more confident. I'm so grateful to be trusted with such an amazing job by God. I'm humbled and excited to continue doing it as frequently as I can.
January 26, 2011
April 11, 2010
The parable of the talents
The church sermon I listened to this morning at the New Covenant church in Albuquerque New Mexico hit me hard. It was about Matthew's 25 14-30, the parable of the talents.
I knew in essence what this parable was about, but I learned so much more & would like to share with you what I feel God meant for me to learn & to apply in my triathlon training & racing.
14"Again, it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted his property to them. 15To one he gave five talents of money, to another two talents, and to another one talent, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey. 16The man who had received the five talents went at once and put his money to work and gained five more. 17So also, the one with the two talents gained two more. 18But the man who had received the one talent went off, dug a hole in the ground and hid his master's money.
19"After a long time the master of those servants returned and settled accounts with them. 20The man who had received the five talents brought the other five. 'Master,' he said, 'you entrusted me with five talents. See, I have gained five more.'
21"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'
22"The man with the two talents also came. 'Master,' he said, 'you entrusted me with two talents; see, I have gained two more.'
23"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'
24"Then the man who had received the one talent came. 'Master,' he said, 'I knew that you are a hard man, harvesting where you have not sown and gathering where you have not scattered seed. 25So I was afraid and went out and hid your talent in the ground. See, here is what belongs to you.'
26"His master replied, 'You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed? 27Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest.
28" 'Take the talent from him and give it to the one who has the ten talents. 29For everyone who has will be given more, and he will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him. 30And throw that worthless servant outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.
This is what I learned today & how I believe it was meant to be applied in my life. The majority of what I am writing from here on is by memory of the church sermon this morning & my own interpretation of what I remember and am reading. If there is any biblical misinterpretations please know it is my fault, not that of God, the particular version of bible I am reading, or my pastor.
'
-the master who departed in this parable is Jesus. When He departed he left each person (his followers, including you & I) with money (or talents) according to their abilities. No one received more or less than they could handle. If he failed in his assignment they could not claim they had failed because of being overwhelmed. Failure could only come from laziness or hatred to his father. The talents represents any type of resources we are given. We are responsible to use what God has given us. The issue isn't how much we are given, but how well we use what we have.
In verse 19 it says "after a long time He shall return". The verse doesn't say a specific time frame. We should live like He is returning tomorrow, we are to use our time, talents, & treasures diligently in order to serve God in whatever we do.
When the master returned the 1st 2 servants showed they had taken the money (talents) they were given & had invested it well. Verse 21 says "His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'
If you notice the master rewards each of the 1st 2 servants equally. What matters isn't how much you are given, what counts is what you do with the talent God gave us.
The 3rd servant had a talent, but instead of using his talent for his master he buried it. The 3rd servant was only thinking of himself. He even admitted that he knew his master, "harvested where you have not sown & gather where you did not plant." What, "harvested where you have not sown & gather where you did not plant." means is that Jesus expects us to use the talents He has given us to spread His word.
The last servant was judged because of his self centeredness. We as God's children must not make excuses to avoid doing what God calls us to do. I believe God is truly my master & I must obey Him willingly. My time, money, & abilities are not mine in the 1st pace, they are His! I am a caretaker of my talents, not an owner.
This parable describes the consequences of the attitude of Christ's return. The person who diligently prepares for it by investing his or her talent to serve God will be rewarded. The person who has no heart for the work of the kingdom will be punished. God rewards faithfulness. Those who bear no fruit for Gods kingdom cannot expect to be treated the same as those who are faithful.
My pastor said each & everyone of us are given a talent. It is our responsibility to figure out how God has specifically gifted each of us.
I believe I have a passion for triathlon. When I started training for triathlon I was VERY out of shape & over weight. My only goal was to finish a triathlon. not even to finish with a half way decent time, just to be able to finish. After I finished my first triathlon I became addicted & now I train obsessively. Each season I've become a little faster, & with each improvement I made I became more passionate. As I gained speed & finished faster each year another unexpected thing happened. More people started to come up to me & asked how I was improving so much.
When people ask me how I have become faster or how did I do in the race, that is my opportunity to use the talent & passion God gave me! When people ask me how I became faster I will glorify God! I will say,"God spoiled me today. He deserves all the Glory!". On top of mentioning God any opportunity I get I am going to buy a Christian triathlon bib to race in, I'm going to put something on my bike that says I race for Christ, & I am going to use this blog to glorify God & all the things he does to help me in all things triathlon.
Perhaps God may decide to germinate some of the seeds I am spreading in His name, for in Matthew's it says:
And Jesus came and spake unto them, saying, All power is given unto me in heaven and in earth.
Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost:
Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.
And in Mark 16:15 it says: And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature.
He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.
The word "Go" is a verb. These two scriptures are known as the Great Commission, and if I can't get motivated from the words of Jesus...........
September 15, 2009
Cochiti swim, great support, & my dang weight issue!
Today I took my family to Cochiti lake. My wife & I had a picnic & played with our babies. After that I put on my wet suit & did some open water swimming. I felt fast & comfortable. Much more so than any other open water swim I've ever done. Part of that is I'm 27 pounds lighter than my normal race weight. I fit in my wet suit better so I don't feel like I'm being squeezed to death by a boa constrictor. The major reason I felt so comfortable in the water is I'm swimming consistently for the first time in my triathlon career. Imagine that!
I am dieing to find out how far it was from the shore line at the swim area, out to the buoy on the far left, following along the outside of the boat buoy's, until the far right shore line. If anyone knows please let me in on the secret.
I'm so very grateful for the support system I have in life & in triathlon. I've fallen off the diet wagon for the last 3 days. It started on my first full day of vacation. Celebration is a big food trigger for me. I'm sure excitement about my up coming race is also a huge contributing factor also.
On of the first motivators for me to stop overeating was today I drove to Alb & picked up my bike from JusMe. He cleaned & tuned up my bike. He even took off the race numbers I'd left on my bike from the last year of racing! As soon as I saw my tri-machine looking completely clean & ready to roll I got motivated to race! And who can race fat? Not me!
The other big help was a great guy & blogger was in town for work. I got to hang with him, talk triathlon, & even watch an episode of The biggest Loser. While here he talked to me about triathlon racing & our issues with weight. He helped me realize I'll never be cured. I can't be perfect ALL of the time. But I can be perfect %85 of the time. I was beginning to feel after 3 days all was lost & I was on the downward slide. But like JusMe says,"it's not a road without some bumps along the way".
I'm bound to get knocked on my butt on from time to time. That doesn't make my journey to becoming an ultra-thin, ultra endurance triathlete a failure. & failing at accomplishing that goal wouldn't even make me a failure. I'm a success at what's most important to me, being a follower of Christ, a father, & a husband. 10 years ago I wouldn't have thought I could be worth 2 shakes of a dogs tail at any of those things. But I am.
Giving up on my weight loss goal would mean I had stopped trying. & I don't believe I have any quit in me. I'm a stubborn, hard working, dedicated man in all things. Diet just seems to be the one area I'm going to have to get up & dust myself off from most often. & tomorrow I'm going to do just that. For tomorrow I WILL be a success. I will be back on the wagon. I will eventually fall off again. I know that, but I will continue to get up as many times as it takes to succeed at becoming the triathlete I so desperately desire to be.... a thin one.
I am dieing to find out how far it was from the shore line at the swim area, out to the buoy on the far left, following along the outside of the boat buoy's, until the far right shore line. If anyone knows please let me in on the secret.
I'm so very grateful for the support system I have in life & in triathlon. I've fallen off the diet wagon for the last 3 days. It started on my first full day of vacation. Celebration is a big food trigger for me. I'm sure excitement about my up coming race is also a huge contributing factor also.
On of the first motivators for me to stop overeating was today I drove to Alb & picked up my bike from JusMe. He cleaned & tuned up my bike. He even took off the race numbers I'd left on my bike from the last year of racing! As soon as I saw my tri-machine looking completely clean & ready to roll I got motivated to race! And who can race fat? Not me!
The other big help was a great guy & blogger was in town for work. I got to hang with him, talk triathlon, & even watch an episode of The biggest Loser. While here he talked to me about triathlon racing & our issues with weight. He helped me realize I'll never be cured. I can't be perfect ALL of the time. But I can be perfect %85 of the time. I was beginning to feel after 3 days all was lost & I was on the downward slide. But like JusMe says,"it's not a road without some bumps along the way".
I'm bound to get knocked on my butt on from time to time. That doesn't make my journey to becoming an ultra-thin, ultra endurance triathlete a failure. & failing at accomplishing that goal wouldn't even make me a failure. I'm a success at what's most important to me, being a follower of Christ, a father, & a husband. 10 years ago I wouldn't have thought I could be worth 2 shakes of a dogs tail at any of those things. But I am.
Giving up on my weight loss goal would mean I had stopped trying. & I don't believe I have any quit in me. I'm a stubborn, hard working, dedicated man in all things. Diet just seems to be the one area I'm going to have to get up & dust myself off from most often. & tomorrow I'm going to do just that. For tomorrow I WILL be a success. I will be back on the wagon. I will eventually fall off again. I know that, but I will continue to get up as many times as it takes to succeed at becoming the triathlete I so desperately desire to be.... a thin one.
February 13, 2009
My comitement to my children
A lot of people often complain to me that their children weren't born with a manual. They are. It is written in the bible how I should raise my children. What I should do & even what I should expect. Here are some of my favorite bible verses about our children.
Deuteronomy 6:6
These commandments that I give you today are to be apon your hearts. Impress them a on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road,when you lie down and when you get up.
Proverbs 22:6
Train a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old he will not turn from it.
This verse hits me particularly hard. I need to give conscious effort in how I act each moment of each day. Will I live for Him, or live worldly. Each decision I make affects my childrens views on life and what should be important to them. God, or the world.
Ephesians 6:4
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.
Psalm 127 3-5
Children are a gift from the Lord;
they are a reward from him.
Children born to a young man
are like arrows in a warrior’s hands.
How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them!
He will not be put to shame when he confronts his accusers at the city gates
Proverbs 13:24
Those who spare the rod of discipline hate their children. Those who love their children care enough to discipline them.
Mathew 18:6
But if you cause one of these little ones who trusts in me to fall into sin, it would be better for you to have a large millstone tied around your neck and be drowned in the depths of the sea.
2 Timothy 3:15
You have been taught the holy Scriptures from childhood, and they have given you the wisdom to receive the salvation that comes by trusting in Christ Jesus.
1 John 3
See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are! But the people who belong to this world don’t recognize that we are God’s children because they don’t know him. Dear friends, we are already God’s children, but he has not yet shown us what we will be like when Christ appears. But we do know that we will be like him, for we will see him as he really is. And all who have this eager expectation will keep themselves pure, just as he is pure.
Deuteronomy 6:6
These commandments that I give you today are to be apon your hearts. Impress them a on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road,when you lie down and when you get up.
Proverbs 22:6
Train a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old he will not turn from it.
This verse hits me particularly hard. I need to give conscious effort in how I act each moment of each day. Will I live for Him, or live worldly. Each decision I make affects my childrens views on life and what should be important to them. God, or the world.
Ephesians 6:4
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.
Psalm 127 3-5
Children are a gift from the Lord;
they are a reward from him.
Children born to a young man
are like arrows in a warrior’s hands.
How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them!
He will not be put to shame when he confronts his accusers at the city gates
Proverbs 13:24
Those who spare the rod of discipline hate their children. Those who love their children care enough to discipline them.
Mathew 18:6
But if you cause one of these little ones who trusts in me to fall into sin, it would be better for you to have a large millstone tied around your neck and be drowned in the depths of the sea.
2 Timothy 3:15
You have been taught the holy Scriptures from childhood, and they have given you the wisdom to receive the salvation that comes by trusting in Christ Jesus.
1 John 3
See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are! But the people who belong to this world don’t recognize that we are God’s children because they don’t know him. Dear friends, we are already God’s children, but he has not yet shown us what we will be like when Christ appears. But we do know that we will be like him, for we will see him as he really is. And all who have this eager expectation will keep themselves pure, just as he is pure.
July 07, 2008
Heavens a better place
Thursday night I got a call while I was at work. My Dad was in the hospital. I don't have the strength right now to go into details. But Friday July 4th he died shortly after 10 pm. Heavens a much better place now with him in it. I'll miss him horribly, but I will see him again when God's ready to take me home to him too. I wrote this & will read it Thursday at his funeral.
Bob was a great man. Bob taught me more than any other man ever could have. He took me under his wing & took on the impossible task of teaching me patience with those I loved & taught unconditional love. He came into my life in my darkest years. By my late teens I'd become adept at judging each person on a daily basis. I'd learned to turn my back on anyone if I felt threatened. No matter how close they had been to me. Bob started to teach me to love unconditionally. He taught me by example. He taught by loving my Mom & I no matter what kind of hard-hearted self defense mechanisms I employed. He'd feel some kind of emotional door slam shut & he'd simply wait for me to show up, to trust, & love. Time & time again I shut doors on him, & even my own Mom. I've gone many times as far as not calling or seeing Bob or my Mom for months on end. Each time I hurt them both deeply. One day I'd just show up again, & each time he'd let me into his heart & his home. He'd never ask why, he'd never tell me not to again, he never even judged me. He knew I was broken inside. He had no reason at all to keep opening himself up to such a broken person. But he did. I was slow in learning the lessons he knew were important for me to be happy with myself. It was a slow & painful process for him & I both, but eventually I started to learn to trust in people enough to love unconditionally, not just when it as safe for me to do so.
Bob was such a loving, kind, & honorable man. He lived every moment & made every decision based on a deep sense of right & wrong. He never lied to anyone as long as I knew him. That would be impossible for anyone else. But it was true with him. He never lied. In the late 90's Bob started telling me he was proud of me. When he started telling me this I was so stunned. It meant so very much to me because if he said it, he meant it. His expectations were very high. He expected me to be a trustworthy and honest man. He expected me to love the people that God put into my life for me to love. He demanded I make each decision in life based off of what was right. The best thing he taught me was to love. The next was a great set of morals & scruples. The one thing he told me over & over again was "good men finish last, but it's worth it".
I owe him so much. Without him in my life I wouldn't have been able to have courted Cindy. She would never have fallen in love with the man I was before Bob healed my heart. I wouldn't have her or the gorgeous children that we have now. Without Bob I wouldn't have been able to rebuild my relationship with my Mom. He reached a hardened unreachable young man. He gradually chipped away my hard exterior. Because of him I can love. It's been a blessing to have been loved by him. I love Bob unconditionally. When Jesus is ready to take me home, I will be so excited to see him again. But until then I will do my best to live my life as an example to the people around me just as Bob did for me.
Bob was a great man. Bob taught me more than any other man ever could have. He took me under his wing & took on the impossible task of teaching me patience with those I loved & taught unconditional love. He came into my life in my darkest years. By my late teens I'd become adept at judging each person on a daily basis. I'd learned to turn my back on anyone if I felt threatened. No matter how close they had been to me. Bob started to teach me to love unconditionally. He taught me by example. He taught by loving my Mom & I no matter what kind of hard-hearted self defense mechanisms I employed. He'd feel some kind of emotional door slam shut & he'd simply wait for me to show up, to trust, & love. Time & time again I shut doors on him, & even my own Mom. I've gone many times as far as not calling or seeing Bob or my Mom for months on end. Each time I hurt them both deeply. One day I'd just show up again, & each time he'd let me into his heart & his home. He'd never ask why, he'd never tell me not to again, he never even judged me. He knew I was broken inside. He had no reason at all to keep opening himself up to such a broken person. But he did. I was slow in learning the lessons he knew were important for me to be happy with myself. It was a slow & painful process for him & I both, but eventually I started to learn to trust in people enough to love unconditionally, not just when it as safe for me to do so.
Bob was such a loving, kind, & honorable man. He lived every moment & made every decision based on a deep sense of right & wrong. He never lied to anyone as long as I knew him. That would be impossible for anyone else. But it was true with him. He never lied. In the late 90's Bob started telling me he was proud of me. When he started telling me this I was so stunned. It meant so very much to me because if he said it, he meant it. His expectations were very high. He expected me to be a trustworthy and honest man. He expected me to love the people that God put into my life for me to love. He demanded I make each decision in life based off of what was right. The best thing he taught me was to love. The next was a great set of morals & scruples. The one thing he told me over & over again was "good men finish last, but it's worth it".
I owe him so much. Without him in my life I wouldn't have been able to have courted Cindy. She would never have fallen in love with the man I was before Bob healed my heart. I wouldn't have her or the gorgeous children that we have now. Without Bob I wouldn't have been able to rebuild my relationship with my Mom. He reached a hardened unreachable young man. He gradually chipped away my hard exterior. Because of him I can love. It's been a blessing to have been loved by him. I love Bob unconditionally. When Jesus is ready to take me home, I will be so excited to see him again. But until then I will do my best to live my life as an example to the people around me just as Bob did for me.
May 13, 2008
weight loss ideas
I've been struggling with my weight since I graduated from high school. I've tried every diet out there. Allot of them were bad & did more damage than good. But I learned something from each & everything I tried. Sometimes I learned what worked. Sometimes I learned what things were really really bad I've applied all those lessons into my training & diet & have gotten some great
results....finally. I thought I'd share some of the things I've been doing.
1st & foremost I pray. I pray to lose weight. & I even pray to become a faster triathlete. Its a truly selfish request of mine that God seems to be granting. So the first thing I want everyone to know is that I give all the glory to my Lord Jesus Christ! The reason I am able to succeed is because of Him. He's allowed me to learn the skills to be able to apply to losing weight, & he's
given me the fortitude to live with my emotional eating issues. He's put great people in my life to support me & to teach me. Great leaders for triathlon, faith, diet, & a better more rewarding way to live life, which would be for Him, not me. For all things that are good lead to Him. Period.
A great guy asked me this weekend what the heck my trick is to losing weight. I told him I'd put it up on my blog. So here it goes. First, pray. Ask for help from Him. The 2nd part is hardest. Accept whatever his will is regardless of whether His answer is the one you wanted or not. Be willing to accept his will regardless of whether its success or failure at what you requested. Its as
simple as that.
I'll also try to explain some of the things I've been applying to my diet that I've learned over the past 12 years of fighting a battle with obesity. I guess you could say the way I eat is by periodization. I eat 2200 calories a day to start (my base). I eat approximately 32-40 grams of lean protein every 3 hrs. That usually adds up to 6-7 meals a day. I then subtract the amount of calories those lean sources of protein have from 2200. The amount of protein I eat a day
always stays about the same. The remaining calories I split up equally into each of those 6-7 meals a day I eat. Those remaining calories are what I eat in carbs & fat. Then from there I keep track of my exercise. I figure out how many calories that day I am going to expend. I divide those calories into each meal I'm going to eat that day with a good portion of those being consumed immediately after my workout to start the body's recovery process immediately. These earned calories are always more carbs & fat. As I said, my protein levels always stay roughly the same. I don't add more protein from my earned exercise calories. By following this plan on light workout days I avoid eating extra calories, on heavy workout days I'm properly fueling my body with quality fats & carbs to allow for high quality workouts & refueling.
The other thing I've learned that I've got amazing results from is I only eat things I can grow, pick, or kill. If I can't grow, pick, or kill it I don't eat it. That allows me to eat fruits, veggies, lean meats, nuts, beans, & moderate amounts of dairy. It keeps me away from any processed foods.I've found staying away from processed food really helps me get & stay thinner. I have found through trial & error that if I eat the same amount of calories in clean foods rather than processed foods I lose more weight & feel allot better, I fatigue less during my workouts etc. Some people think this means I don't eat grains. Its true most of the grains people eat are processed, & I don't eat those. But I do eat grains. Just the unprocessed ones. I eat oat
meal (not individually packaged & flavored stuff because those are more highly processed), bugler, brown rice etc. That is all I have been doing. That simple.
God bless you guys, & thanks for tuning in.
results....finally. I thought I'd share some of the things I've been doing.
1st & foremost I pray. I pray to lose weight. & I even pray to become a faster triathlete. Its a truly selfish request of mine that God seems to be granting. So the first thing I want everyone to know is that I give all the glory to my Lord Jesus Christ! The reason I am able to succeed is because of Him. He's allowed me to learn the skills to be able to apply to losing weight, & he's
given me the fortitude to live with my emotional eating issues. He's put great people in my life to support me & to teach me. Great leaders for triathlon, faith, diet, & a better more rewarding way to live life, which would be for Him, not me. For all things that are good lead to Him. Period.
A great guy asked me this weekend what the heck my trick is to losing weight. I told him I'd put it up on my blog. So here it goes. First, pray. Ask for help from Him. The 2nd part is hardest. Accept whatever his will is regardless of whether His answer is the one you wanted or not. Be willing to accept his will regardless of whether its success or failure at what you requested. Its as
simple as that.
I'll also try to explain some of the things I've been applying to my diet that I've learned over the past 12 years of fighting a battle with obesity. I guess you could say the way I eat is by periodization. I eat 2200 calories a day to start (my base). I eat approximately 32-40 grams of lean protein every 3 hrs. That usually adds up to 6-7 meals a day. I then subtract the amount of calories those lean sources of protein have from 2200. The amount of protein I eat a day
always stays about the same. The remaining calories I split up equally into each of those 6-7 meals a day I eat. Those remaining calories are what I eat in carbs & fat. Then from there I keep track of my exercise. I figure out how many calories that day I am going to expend. I divide those calories into each meal I'm going to eat that day with a good portion of those being consumed immediately after my workout to start the body's recovery process immediately. These earned calories are always more carbs & fat. As I said, my protein levels always stay roughly the same. I don't add more protein from my earned exercise calories. By following this plan on light workout days I avoid eating extra calories, on heavy workout days I'm properly fueling my body with quality fats & carbs to allow for high quality workouts & refueling.
The other thing I've learned that I've got amazing results from is I only eat things I can grow, pick, or kill. If I can't grow, pick, or kill it I don't eat it. That allows me to eat fruits, veggies, lean meats, nuts, beans, & moderate amounts of dairy. It keeps me away from any processed foods.I've found staying away from processed food really helps me get & stay thinner. I have found through trial & error that if I eat the same amount of calories in clean foods rather than processed foods I lose more weight & feel allot better, I fatigue less during my workouts etc. Some people think this means I don't eat grains. Its true most of the grains people eat are processed, & I don't eat those. But I do eat grains. Just the unprocessed ones. I eat oat
meal (not individually packaged & flavored stuff because those are more highly processed), bugler, brown rice etc. That is all I have been doing. That simple.
God bless you guys, & thanks for tuning in.
June 20, 2007
Gee, I wonder why our country's struggling?
America is taking God out of our country. It's not a coincident that our country is now struggling.
He isn't allowed in our schools any longer either, so it's no coincident that shootings, beatings, crime, and drugs are in our children's schools more now than ever.
I tell you, the kingdom of God will be taken away from you and given to a nation that will produce proper fruit. Mat 21:43
We have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Romans 5:1
The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue and honor them. I will reward them with a long life and give them my salvation.” Psalm 91 14-16
The Lord keeps you from all harm and watches over your life. The Lord keeps watch over you as you come and go, both now and forever. Psalm 121 7-8
He isn't allowed in our schools any longer either, so it's no coincident that shootings, beatings, crime, and drugs are in our children's schools more now than ever.
I tell you, the kingdom of God will be taken away from you and given to a nation that will produce proper fruit. Mat 21:43
We have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Romans 5:1
The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue and honor them. I will reward them with a long life and give them my salvation.” Psalm 91 14-16
The Lord keeps you from all harm and watches over your life. The Lord keeps watch over you as you come and go, both now and forever. Psalm 121 7-8
June 15, 2007
Isn't it strange 3
Isn't it strange how $20 seems like such a big amount when giving it to your church but so little when shopping?
June 06, 2007
Isn't it strange 2?
Isn't it strange how we send jokes in emails and they are forwarded right away, but when we are going to send messages about God we think about it twice before we share it with others?
May 26, 2007
A letter from our heavenly Father
Dear One:
You are not here, at this moment in time by some mere coincidence any more than you are on this planet by some random act of fate. I created you and I have a unique purpose for your life that you and only you can fulfill. Many things vie for your attention and affection, but your life is about much more than what you can see with your own eyes or touch with your own hands.
I love you, I love you so much that I sent Jesus to this earth so that you and I could be reconciled. His death was the ultimate expression of My love for you. In Jesus, My love is revealed, and I long for you to know the peace, freedom and forgiveness for which He died. I gave up everything I loved to demonstrate my impassioned love for you. Jesus' death for your life. His rescue is for all who call on Him as Savior, including you.
You may or may not be aware right now that you need to be saved. But beloved, you do. Your dependencies will not last and your securities will fail, but take comfort, because I know what tomorrow holds. I see you and I know your thoughts, fears, concerns and secrets. I know you better than anyone and I love you more than anyone ever could. It's My desire to lavish My love on you. So come to Me...I will give you rest. Come to Me...I will give you peace. Come to Me...I will carry you no matter what your life is or will be. Come to Me...and I will be your constant rescue.
Come to Me by coming to Jesus, who came for you.
Love, Your Heavenly Father
Colossians 1:16, Psalm 139, Ephesians 2:10, Romans 8:31-32, Romans 11:33, John 18:3,; 1 John 4:10, 2 Corinthians 4:18, 2 Corinthians 5:18-19, John 17:26, John 10:9-10, 2 Corinthians 5:14-15; Romans 5:8, Romans 10:9, Romans 3;23, Mark 4:22, Matthew 11:28, John 14:27, 1 John 3;1, Isaiah 53
You are not here, at this moment in time by some mere coincidence any more than you are on this planet by some random act of fate. I created you and I have a unique purpose for your life that you and only you can fulfill. Many things vie for your attention and affection, but your life is about much more than what you can see with your own eyes or touch with your own hands.
I love you, I love you so much that I sent Jesus to this earth so that you and I could be reconciled. His death was the ultimate expression of My love for you. In Jesus, My love is revealed, and I long for you to know the peace, freedom and forgiveness for which He died. I gave up everything I loved to demonstrate my impassioned love for you. Jesus' death for your life. His rescue is for all who call on Him as Savior, including you.
You may or may not be aware right now that you need to be saved. But beloved, you do. Your dependencies will not last and your securities will fail, but take comfort, because I know what tomorrow holds. I see you and I know your thoughts, fears, concerns and secrets. I know you better than anyone and I love you more than anyone ever could. It's My desire to lavish My love on you. So come to Me...I will give you rest. Come to Me...I will give you peace. Come to Me...I will carry you no matter what your life is or will be. Come to Me...and I will be your constant rescue.
Come to Me by coming to Jesus, who came for you.
Love, Your Heavenly Father
Colossians 1:16, Psalm 139, Ephesians 2:10, Romans 8:31-32, Romans 11:33, John 18:3,; 1 John 4:10, 2 Corinthians 4:18, 2 Corinthians 5:18-19, John 17:26, John 10:9-10, 2 Corinthians 5:14-15; Romans 5:8, Romans 10:9, Romans 3;23, Mark 4:22, Matthew 11:28, John 14:27, 1 John 3;1, Isaiah 53
May 23, 2007
Isn't it strange?
Isn't it strange how everyone wants a place in heaven, but they don't want to believe , do, or say anything to get there?
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